Apparently, my friends are a bunch of stoners.


I think I’m what they call ‘straight-edge’. Is that the right term? I drink the minimal amount of wine coolers and refuse to do drugs or smoke cigarettes under any circumstances whatsoever. People like to tell me I will change my mind about doing drugs someday as a part of my natural youngin’ stupidity. I find this disturbing.

So you’d think the fact that I’m the polar opposite of every stoner ever makes it kind of weird that most of my friends are indeed high about fifty percent of the time. And you’d be right.

I kind of understand how it happened. It goes by similar rules to how I managed to get in with the cliquey emo crowd in high school. I befriended/was pitied by the group leader. They’re usually the only ones with any form of individual thoughts of their own and the rest of the group just does whatever the crap they do. I’m pretty sure I’ve been using this friend building system my entire life…it never works well, but it seriously happens every time.

I went to that zombie party on…was it Tuesday? It was fairly fun, even though half the people got randomly drunk off smirnoff and we ended up giving up on zombies and watching Glee for hours on end singing show tunes. One of my high school buddies came, and she was so clearly out of place that I felt sorry for her. But at the same time I was pretty damn proud. For once I wasn’t the one who stood out. I had learned to become one of group.

When the party was over, instead of going home and sleeping, I randomly went home with a friend of mine. I had pulled an all-nighter and was cramping all over the place, and my other two friends were high off their gourds. We made a good trio. Now, these are the same friends who offered me a room in a house they want to rent, and it really occured tome how fucked up this situation is.

I love my friends. Really I do. But let’s be practical.

  • They smoke some kind of drug-like substance about every five seconds.
  • They get drunk every night
  • They hate little dogs.
  • They smell absolutely disgusting.
  • They can be rather judgmental when they want to be.

I told them the reason I had a headache and my eyes were watering was due to a mixture of cat allergies and my period being a bitch, but the truth was her house smelled so bad and all the smoke was really starting to get to me. It was nauseating and I’ve always had bad reactions to cigarette smoke, which is why I’ll never try it. I stopped being proud of my status in the group rather quickly. Though I guess it is rather amusing how I’m the uncorrupted unicorn princess. It’s true. I am. That doesn’t change the fact that living with them would be a nightmare.

I don’t want to get rid of my current friends. Despite it all, they are good friends and they’re sensitive about my diabetes, which is very important to me. It can get overbearing at times, but I prefer it to them awkwardly trying to pretend it doesn’t exist, especially when there’s alcohol involved. I’ll always be grateful to one friend who takes such good care of me. At her own birthday party, she made sure I had things to drink (both alcoholic and non) set aside plenty of filtered water for spoiled ‘lil me, and even got me a sugar free cupcake. Even her mother is such a sweetheart. I disagree with her parenting methods completely, but her heart is in the right place and I love how she’s like, “I didn’t know when you’d be coming over again, but look I bought you some sugar free lemonade in case you get thirsty.”

So I will keep them around. But their lifestyle is not for me. I like to think we have an understanding of, “You do your thing and I’ll do mine.” We’ll see how that works out in the future.


Zombies? Partay? Zombie Partay? OH BOY!


I’m writing this at…1 AM, Tuesday morning because I will not be here for most of the day. I am going to a party. Specifically a Zombie Party, if you couldn’t tell from the snazzy title up there.

My friend the Birthday Girl made a few unreasonable requests. She wants me to dress up and bring her a present. I say ha ha to both these requests. One, I just heard about this party a few days ago and I am a perfectionist. There is no way I can find a blow-y0ur-mind-amazing costume in such a short amount of time and it would take forever to make one. Also, I am broke. I have some money saved up, but that’s my money. I can’t even buy myself nice things with that money, so I’m definitely not giving it to her as much as I love her. Call me cheap, but I like to have a couple hundred dollars saved up for emergencies. But maybe that’s just me.

It’s not like she got me a present for my birthday.

My plan is to walk in, scream and start running. You see I’m just going to dress normally and be the Minority Zombie Victim. There has to be at least one. This probably means those freaks are going to bite me, but I think I can live with that. My present will be my wonderful presence, unless I can convince my big gay buddy to put my name on his present.

From my understanding we will be watching zombie movies…excuse me, Romero movies all day. It’s not that I don’t like Dawn of the Dead, but haven’t we all seen it a billion times? It plays on TV practically every other day. The baby zombie scene doesn’t even shock me anymore. To shake things up I suggested we watch Dead Alive, or Braindead as its known by some cool cats. It’s an amazing movie, very funny, lots of gore, what more could you want? It occurred to me a little while ago that they will probably hate it. This blows my mind really. How can anyone hate a movie that has a kung-fu zombie priest? I just…

There’s a scene where they’re in a graveyard and this priest appears out of nowhere and goes, “This calls for divine intervention!” He goes all kung-fu and makes a perfect scene even greater by going, “I kick ass for the Lord!”

I don’t really understand how someone who claims to love zombie films can hate that movie. Then again those freaks love the Saw movies so…can’t count much for taste I guess.

It’s a good thing I didn’t suggest we watch Zombie Honeymoon, My Boyfriend’s Back or Grace… well not suggesting Grace is a good idea. That movie freaks me out. Definitely a bad idea for a party. But the first two are zombie chick flicks. Zombie chick flicks! They’re amazing in awful, awful ways.

We’ll see how it goes. I think it’ll be fun to see everyone at the very least. As a zombie fangirl, I’ll see if I can enlighten them to the best/worst of zombie culture beyond Romero’s movies and Zombieland.

Zombieland 2 needs more zombies by the way. Way more.

Songs I Love (Some of them anyway…)


People tend to think I’m lying when I say I like all kinds of music. Seriously. If you mention even once that you enjoy kpop, in the minds of everyone around you, that’s ALL you listen to. I don’t really understand this mindset…or at least I didn’t until I met some of the psychotic kpop fangirls. They frightened me.

My taste in music is strange to say the least. It’s not a big passion in my life like it is with some people. I’m more of a visual person, so I could never just sit there listening to music for hours on end. It’s literally the most boring thing in the world to me. I also don’t like my music to be too loud and I don’t care if it’s in English or not because my hearing is so bad I can’t understand most lyrics anyway without multiple listenings.

But today I am in a musical mood. So I used a random online generator ( to pick a few of my favorite songs. They were all anime songs, effectively making me look like a nerd. So I picked again and I think I still look like a nerd…but it’s not as bad as before. Without further ado, here are a few of my favorite songs.

1. HeyHiHello – Brighter Lights

I first heard this song when I was having this mini-meltdown. I don’t know what I was upset about, but I know this song cheered me up immediately. It had nothing to do with the fact that I’m kind of in love with the guy singing. Of course not.

2. “E”qual/Stronger ft. May J.

Oh god it’s Asian. Cue a bunch of people turning their noses up at it. I randomly heard this song on this one blog I was looking at. Usually I curse blogs with automatic music, but I fell in love with this one immediately. It’s so powerful. Though this is one I never bothered to look up the lyrics for, so it might not mean what I think it means. Ah well. It sounds pretty.

3. Hollywood Undead – Paradise Lost

…people look at me funny when they see I like this song. It’s like it’s not that big of a surprise that I like asian music, because I’m weird. Then I pull this baby out and people don’t know what to do. My friend introduced me to this group as a joke, thinking I’d hate it. Frankly, they’re alright. Not my favorite group. But this song! I love it so much and I’m not sure why. Probably because it’s amazing to listen to when you’re pissed off at the world. Try it. You’ll feel so much better.

4. Haibane Renmei OST – Free Bird

I am going to be outright spamming this blog with music from this OST. All of it is beautiful, but this is my absolute favorite. It’s so simple, yet it’s one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard. Don’t judge it too harshly because it’s from an anime. Most people do and they’re honestly missing out on this beautiful music.

5. Puccini – Madame Butterfly (extremely high note in the beginning, so lower your speakers at first)

I saved this one for last cause…heh. If you recognize the name you know why. This is from the opera Madame Butterfly. I know the song has an actual name in Italian, but I have no clue what it is so we’ll stick with that for now. This song makes me all girly and emotional, so I won’t get too in detail about what she’s singing about for now. Just try to listen and enjoy it. Or at the very least give it a chance. This is some classy stuff here. Pinkies up!

Nostalgia Kick – Inuyasha! (Cue flashback of 7th grade)


kagome to inuyasha Pictures, Images and Photos


There was a time in my life when I wanted to marry that half-demon. I loved that show with a passion that was kind of horrifying.

Sadly enough, I’ve been an anime fan all my life without realizing it with various older classics. But the reason I learned what ‘anime’ was and got into the whole scary world was all because of Inuyasha. He started it all.

If you’ve never heard of it, I hate writing synopses. So instead, I’m going to borrow the one from MyAnimeList:

Higurashi Kagome, after being pulled down a well by a demon, finds herself in Feudal Japan, where she learns that a powerful jewel has been reborn inside her body. After the jewel shatters in an attempt to retrieve it from one of the many demons who was after its power, Kagome must join forces with the half-demon Inu Yasha (also after the jewel’s power) to track down the shards of the jewel before its power falls into the wrong hands. (Source: ANN)

I first saw an episode back when Adult Swim was awesome and aired anime constantly (or at least it seemed that way to me). It was one of the earlier episodes in the first season. Specifically that episode was called ‘The Soul Piper and the Mischievous Little Soul’, episode 12.

…don’t judge me.

Or maybe you should judge me. I just stopped writing to go watch that episode again for old time’s sake. It’s still my favorite one and it’s sad how much I enjoyed it. I guess they’re right when they say you never forget your first love. And my love was psychotic and intense. At the time I didn’t know what the show was called, but I had this love at first sight type reaction. It wasn’t until around a year later that my cousin finally showed me what the show was and my soul was thereby stolen (Do you know what horrible chain reaction you started Raymond!? DO YOU!?).

Obsessed is a little tame for what happened, but it’ll have to be close enough for now. I taped all the episodes. To this day I have about ten VHS tapes of Inuyasha and I just don’t have the heart to throw them out. I made my mom buy me the first movie, imported from Japan immediately after I saw it existed because for some reason I thought it would never ever come to America. A month later they made an English DVD, which I also made her buy me. Really my mom was a champ. If I had been her I would have smacked my retarded child.  A few months after that she bought me the first season on DVD for $80. Today I need to love a series with all my heart and soul to even consider spending that much money, and even then it’s probably not happening.

I think my favorite Inuyasha item is I have his fang necklace. It glows in the dark. I would have a picture of it, but my phone and my email are like, “No” so apparently no pictures until later edits I suppose.  But look, here’s the whole gang!


It’s such a shame. The reason I stopped watching this show was because there was something severely wrong with Rumiko Takahashi when she was making this. It started off strong, presented amazing characters, a great villian and the chance for something epic. And then it dragged on…and on…and on…a billion episodes later, Naraku (the villian dude) is still alive, I don’t even know if the jewel shard was complete and Inuyasha is still pining over his undead-pissed off-soulless ex-girlfriend, AKA Kikyo.

Hell I think the Kikyo crap is the main reason I stopped. I didn’t hear about what a mess the plot had become until a few years later. Let me tell you, Inuyasha and Kagome are in love. It’s all very sweet. And she is the reincarnation of Kikyo, so you’d think that’d be good enough for him. But no! Kikyo comes along,  insists she’s evil now and tries to kill him several times and he keeps up his awful crush on her. Oh how it made me rage. I raged like a fangirl has never raged before. And eventually, slowly but surely, my love of Inuyasha faded. This was also around the time I started discovering new and better anime, so I didn’t look back.

Someday, in a fit of pure insanity I will watch this show again. From start to finish. I swear it will be the best and worst day of my life all at once. From what I understand, they actually ended the show a while ago and it was a coherent, decent ending. As tempting as it is to drop everything and go watch that final season now…I don’t want to. I guess the love has faded a bit. But someday, we shall see.

Writer’s block is a lot like constipation…


Not that I was constipated or anything, but we have one tiny bathroom in my house of four to five people. Five hours and a busted bladder later, that title was born. It really has nothing to do with the following post at all, but it amused me.

I’ve been getting lectured a lot lately. I was patient at first, but now I want to punch anyone that tries it. The problem is, they’re giving me great advice but it’s all the same stuff!

I’ve been thinking about roommates. I don’t have any interviews lined up or apartments being held for me. I literally just went, “Getting a roommate someday might be an option when I move out.” It didn’t help that a friend of mine offered me a room to live in in this make-shift dorm she’s making, an offer I’ve turned down until further notice (I didn’t like some of the details, and a lot are left up in the air, so until more things are made clear I’m not even considering it).

And then everyone exploded.

“Roommates are dangerous! So many things can go wrong! You don’t understand! I’m two years older than you so I know so much better! What if you grow to hate them?”

It was kind of funny at first, but now if anyone starts I get this ‘STFU’ type reaction, which results in this huge fight. It started first with a friend of mine and it took all of my will power to not get really bitchy with her. I don’t mind getting advice, but when someone starts with the “I think I’d know better than you” it bugs me. It didn’t help that she’s lived at home all her life and has never had a roommate so…yeah I’m pretty sure I just stopped talking. Now the family is freaking out at me because they want me to live at home forever and be their little pet.

Here’s a tip people: Shut up. I get that you care, but it’s starting to grate on my nerves. I can understand, because I’m working on being an advice-giving menace. I can get aggressive and obnoxious about my advice giving. So I’ve given the benefit of the doubt. Enough is enough. I mentioned roommate ONCE, maybe three weeks ago. Find something new to lecture me about at the very least.

My stand on roommates is this: If you need a roommate, you get a roommate. I mean if it honestly can’t be helped and you can’t stand living at home anymore, what else can you do? Living in a dorm is ideal really, because you have a roommate and there’s less of a financial risk being taken.

Sure, you can end up hating your roommate with every fiber of your being. They might be financial dead weights, or maybe they keep you all night with their humping activities. The lists are endless. But all in all (and this is probably what made everyone so mad) I would rather take a risk and get a roommate then live at home for too long. I’m eighteen now. I don’t want to be here anymore. So getting a roommate is not a plan right now, but it’s an option and I WILL consider it whether anyone likes it or not. I don’t like having my intelligence insulted by people deciding I’m too stubborn to look at all the risk and details. Clearly, that means they don’t know me very well. I mean come on now. It takes me two hours to buy a $3 book because I end up sitting there going, “Is this REALLY worth it? I mean will it be worth my hard earned money?” I am the queen of over thinking. So family and friends, give advice, but please trust me a little bit? There’s no need to yell.